Is It Permissible to Shake Hands with Non-Mahram Women at Work? Islamic Guidance
By : Dr. Mohammad Akram Nadwi
Question:
Assalamu Alaikum wrwb, Shaykh!
Hope you are well. I wanted to ask one that is causing a lot of conflict and confusion in my mind. I recently got a new job and I will have to meet the team in the office. All members of my team are women, and here in the west, shaking hands is very common, and sometimes even hugs are offered. I understand hugs are totally out of question, but I have heard from some scholars that handshakes are okay, so I wanted to ask your opinion on this matter. Usually if it is one or two women, I send them messages ahead of time explaining my position to avoid awkwardness. Should I continue to do that? Click Here To Follow Our WhatsApp Channel
Answer:
Wa alaykum as-salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.
With regard to shaking hands with members of the opposite sex, the established position in Islamic jurisprudence is that a Muslim should not shake hands with a non-maḥram member of the opposite sex. This is based upon the general principles of modesty and the Prophetic guidance concerning physical contact between men and women who are not maḥram to one another.
There are, however, some contemporary scholars who have given a more lenient view in certain circumstances, particularly where there is genuine difficulty, social pressure, or a concern that refusing a handshake may cause significant offence or misunderstanding. This is why you may have heard that handshakes are permissible.
Therefore, if you are meeting someone for the first time and, because of the circumstances, you are unable to explain your religious position beforehand and find yourself in a situation where a handshake is offered, there is no harm in following this more lenient scholarly opinion and shaking hands. This should, however, be understood as an allowance for such circumstances rather than something to be adopted as the normal practice.
In your particular situation, I would advise you to maintain your Islamic practice with courtesy and confidence. There is no need to make the matter unnecessarily awkward, nor is there a need to apologise for it. A simple smile, a verbal greeting such as “It’s very nice to meet you”, and perhaps placing your hand over your heart is usually sufficient to convey warmth and respect without physical contact.
If you already know that you will be meeting someone for the first time and anticipate that a handshake may be offered, there is nothing wrong with sending a brief message beforehand, particularly if you feel this will prevent an awkward moment. However, I would not regard it as necessary to send a message to every colleague in advance. In many situations, a courteous and natural explanation at the moment is enough: “I hope you don’t mind; for religious reasons, I don’t shake hands, but it is a pleasure to meet you.”
As for hugs, these should likewise be avoided with non-maḥram members of the opposite sex.
The important thing is to uphold your religious principles without making the matter unnecessarily difficult for yourself or others. Islam does not require a person to be discourteous in order to observe a religious boundary. One can be warm, professional, respectful and fully engaged with one’s colleagues while maintaining the limits of Islamic etiquette.
May Allah grant you success in your new employment, make the transition easy for you, and enable you to practise your faith with wisdom, dignity and good character.
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